Addiction
March 3, 2020
Being in the midst of addictionis incredibly difficult—and though we all learn about substance use disordersin schools and from popular culture, it’s much different to go through oneyourself. So different, in fact, thatpeople who think they are supporting you may not be providing the help youneed.
If your close social circledoesn’t get how demanding addiction is, it’s okay to look elsewhere forhelp. Even though they may mean well,having loved ones misunderstand you can actually be more painful than helpful. Seemingly small things like the dismissive language often used todiscuss addiction can be discouraging and even degrading. Negative emotions don’t help anyone,especially those struggling with addiction.
If you feel that the peopleclosest to you don’t fully get your struggles, there are other places you cango to find support. Here are some of thebest places to find a caring ear.
Most of us know someone who hasstruggled with excessive substance use and gone through a recoveryprogram. These individuals have a muchclearer picture of what you’re going through than non-users, and they may be ableto offer the empathy and advice you need in the moment.
In fact, having the support ofsomeone else who’s battled addiction is considered so helpful that it’s part of12-step programs. Even if you’re not yetready to enroll in AA or seek treatment, speaking to someone who knows whatyou’re going through can help you make sense of your addiction and plan yournext steps.
Oftentimes those dealing withaddiction are also struggling with mental illness. In fact, mental illness and addiction mayfeed off each other, with mental health downswings triggering even more substance usewhich in turn amplifies the symptoms of mental illness. It’s a tough spiral to escape, and manypeople lack the personal experience to understand how difficult this situationtruly is.
Regardless of whether you’redealing with mental illness on top of your addiction, seeking out a trainedtherapist may be the solution you need. On top of extensive schooling, many therapists have helped othersthrough addiction and have a deeper understanding of the struggles you arefacing. To ensure that your therapisthas the relevant experience to help you through your addiction, reach out tolocal treatment centers such as Windward Way that employ licensed andcredentialed addiction specialists.
AA, NA, and other 12-step-basedgroups provide a support system for anyone looking to fight back againstaddiction. Groups are home to a diversemembership in all different stages of their sobriety journey. That means you’ll be surrounded by those whohave been where you are—and may have other similarities with you as well. Aquick online search can help you find a group, and most locations havemultiple meetings, so you can shop around to see which one makes you mostcomfortable. You may even find a phone-orinternet-based meeting group that is a more convenient and workable solution.
If AA-type programs aren’t foryou, there are plenty of other options. It is possible to work the 12 Steps if you’re not religious, but you may feel morecomfortable secular organizations such as LifeRing and SOS. Other new alternatives include SMART Recovery, Moderation Management, and Refuge Recovery. With the many options available, you’re sure to find an option that iscompatible with your worldview and spirituality.
Spirituality can be a large partof recovery, even outside of 12-step programs. Attending church, synagogue, or another tradition of worship providesyou with a strong social group and a set of values that can help guide youduring recovery. This is true of alltraditions, from Christianity to Buddhism to Lakota Spirituality.
You may also find reliefconfiding in a spiritual leader. Muchlike therapists, those who lead religious groups are likely experienced inhelping their community through struggles including substance usedisorders. Their guidance may help youfind the strength and motivation to seek recovery.
If you do not regularly attendreligious services, community groups can play the same role in providing astrong social network and caring leaders. Confiding in those you look up to and gaining their support can help youbuild the confidence to take bigger strides toward sobriety.
It can be freeing to discussdifficult situations with someone who doesn’t know who you are—especially iffriends or loved ones have given discouraging or hurtful responses when you’veopened up to them. Thankfully, theinternet makes it easy to find a group where no one truly knows who youare. You can vent, ask questions, andfind support without having to share your face or even your full name.
There are many online supportgroups, from method-specific forums run by the recovery groups discussed aboveto more general addiction help groups such as those found on drugabuse.com and The Tribe. You may also be able to find recovery discussions on your socialplatform of choice. Joining twitter hashtags, recovery-focused subreddits, or their equivalents on yourpreferred social media can help you find support and encouragement from acommunity you already feel a part of.
For those who prefer a real-timeone-on-one conversation, an addiction hotline can connect you with a trainedagent who understands what you’re going through. These services also help you learn more aboutaddiction and connect to treatment centers if you are looking for more comprehensivehelp.
You don’t have to feel ashamed of youraddiction Addiction is hard, and asking for help is evenharder. Unfortunately, many of those whohave never experienced a substance use disorder just don’t understand whatyou’re going through. At Ethos, weprovide mentors, a recovery-focused family, and referrals to outside treatmentproviders that can provide further help. If you are tired of feeling misunderstood, reach out to us today, online or at (323) 942-9996.